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Showing posts with label Hope After Rape Conception. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Hope After Rape Conception. Show all posts
Thursday, December 17, 2015
Michigan Senate Unanimously Passes the Rape Survivor Child Custody Act! by Rebecca Kiessling
Yesterday, the 38 Michigan Senators unanimously passed the Rape Survivor Child Custody Act
authorizing courts to terminate the parental rights of rapists upon a rape
conviction or upon a finding based upon “clear and convincing evidence” that
the parent committed “criminal sexual conduct” – the terminology used for rape
under Michigan law – and that the “conduct resulted in the child being
conceived.” SB 629 had 9 co-sponsors,
including one Democrat and one female Republican. So there were 7 male Republicans who,
contrary to the mainstream media, do care about rape victims who become
pregnant.
The bill’s
primary sponsor, Republican Senator Rick Jones, who spent 31 years in law
enforcement said,
“I want to ensure that victims of rape are
not faced with a custody battle from their rapist. . . . I've actually heard of horrible cases where
the rapist contacted the victim after they heard that a child had been
conceived and said: 'Get an abortion, and if you don't, I will be going for
custody. . . . I certainly cannot
imagine a rapist being able to continue to harass the victim, or have custody
of a child conceived in that act.”
Last week, I
testified before the Michigan Senate Judiciary Committee on this
legislation. My background as a Family
Law Attorney helped in explaining why the “clear and convincing evidence”
standard is appropriate. After all, it’s
the standard used in Michigan law for all other termination of parental rights
cases, and it’s the standard set by the U.S. Supreme Court in the case of Santosky v
Kramer.
I shared
stories of women from Save The 1 and
Hope After Rape Conception who were sued by their rapists for custody,
including Analyn
Megison from HARC, Angela
Grogg from HARC and her daughter Pyper, and Save The 1 pro-life speaker Liz
Carl – a birthmother who had to agree to drop criminal charges, just to be
able to consent to an adoption without the rapist getting custody. Additionally, I told the Senators of two
women who were conceived in rape, then raped by their own fathers while in the
rapists’ care – Save The 1 Vice-President Darlene Pawlik, and Rowena
Slusser.
Attorney Shauna Prewitt -- one of my co-founders of Hope After Conception (HARC), who was sued by her rapist for custody, also testified before the Michigan Senate Judiciary Committee by sharing her own compelling story, as well as the research she did for her Georgetown Law Journal article, Giving Birth to a "Rapist's Child": A Discussion and Analysis of the Limited Legal Protections Afforded to Women Who Become Mothers Through Rape.
Attorney Shauna Prewitt -- one of my co-founders of Hope After Conception (HARC), who was sued by her rapist for custody, also testified before the Michigan Senate Judiciary Committee by sharing her own compelling story, as well as the research she did for her Georgetown Law Journal article, Giving Birth to a "Rapist's Child": A Discussion and Analysis of the Limited Legal Protections Afforded to Women Who Become Mothers Through Rape.
By passing
this law, Michigan will be entitled to receive federal funds for programs which
help survivors of rape, in accordance with the federal Rape Survivor Child
Custody Act co-sponsored by Debbie Wasserman-Schultz, passed by Congress and
signed into law by President Obama last June – the only pro-life legislation
approved by the President. This law is
pro-life in effect because if pregnant rape victims know they’ll be protected
from the rapist, they’ll be more likely to choose life. It also provides opportunities for
legislators to hear from rape survivor mothers who deeply love their children,
and we see legislators for once referring to these children as “the rape victim’s
child” instead of the usual derogatory terminology of “the rapist’s child.” So they get to see this issue, the mothers
and their children in a whole new light.
Under
the federal act, Congress made the
following findings:
(1) Men who father children through rape should be
prohibited from visiting or having custody of those children.
(2) According to
several studies, it is estimated that there are between 25,000 and 32,000
rape-related pregnancies annually in the United States.
(3) A substantial number of women choose to raise
their child conceived through rape and, as a result, may face custody battles
with their rapists.
(4) According to one study, 32.3 percent of women
who were raped and became pregnant as a result of the rape kept their child.
(5) Another study found that, of the 73 percent of
women who became pregnant as a result of a rape and carried their pregnancies
to term, 64 percent raised their children.
(6) Rape is one of the most under-prosecuted serious
crimes, with estimates of criminal conviction occurring in less than 5 percent
of rapes.
(7) The clear and convincing evidence standard is
the most common standard for termination of parental rights among the 50
States, territories, and the District of Columbia.
(8) The Supreme Court established that the clear and
convincing evidence standard satisfies due process for allegations to terminate
or restrict parental rights in Santosky v. Kramer (455 U.S. 745 (1982)).
(9) Currently only 6 States have statutes allowing
rape survivors to petition for the termination of parental rights of the rapist
based on clear and convincing evidence that the child was conceived through
rape.
(10) A rapist pursuing parental or custody rights
forces the survivor to have continued interaction with the rapist, which can
have traumatic psychological effects on the survivor, making it more difficult
for her to recover.
(11) These traumatic effects on the mother can
severely negatively impact her ability to raise a healthy child.
(12) Rapists may use the threat of pursuing custody
or parental rights to coerce survivors into not prosecuting rape, or otherwise
harass, intimidate, or manipulate them.
The federal act then provided
additional grant money to states who pass this law: “The Attorney General shall make grants to
States that have in place a law that allows the mother of any child that was
conceived through rape to seek court-ordered termination of the parental rights
of her rapist with regard to that child, which the court shall grant upon clear
and convincing evidence of rape.” The
grant programs are the STOP Violence
Against Women Formula Grant.
We are
currently awaiting on some amendments to the companion bill which authorizes
Family Court judges to suspend custody and parenting time rights upon a showing
of “clear and convincing evidence,” which would then provide rape survivor
mothers with the opportunity to get a case filed for termination of parental
rights. When the bill was passed in the
House to suspend custody and parenting time, 101 Michigan State Representatives
voted in favor of the bill and 4 voted against it. One of those who voted against it, Marcia Hovey-Wright, served
as the Executive Director of Muskegon Area Planned Parenthood. She certainly showed her true colors in
caring more about rapists than rape victim mothers who had the audacity to
choose life for their children.
Many thanks
to Right to Life of Michigan for spearheading this effort in Michigan -- especially Ed Rivet and Genevieve Marnon out of the legislative office in Lansing. You set an example to every Right to Life organization as to how to make this a priority and how to get it done. You've never allowed a rape exception in Michigan, and now you've shown how to continue this protection after the children conceived in rape are born.
BIO: Rebecca Kiessling is a
wife, mother of 5, attorney and international pro-life speaker, conceived
in rape. She’s the founder and President of Save The 1, co-founder of Hope After Rape Conception, and co-founder of Embryo Defense.
Wednesday, June 17, 2015
7 Month Pregnant Gang Rape Victim From India Didn't Really Want an Abortion by Rebecca Kiessling
7-month
pregnant gang rape survivor denied a late-term abortion by the Gujurat high
court in India. With those kinds of news
stories, we regularly see organizations like Amnesty International and Planned
Parenthood International utilizing such stories to demand the legalization of
abortion through all nine of months of pregnancy – not only for rape, but for
any reason. Rape is just the key to open
wide the abortion door.
The ritualistic test involves the tantric interrogating the rape victim, then testing her veracity “by taking a pinch of barley seeds from a bag and asking her to say whether the number of seeds in his hand are even-numbered or odd.” She is then repeatedly subjected to this process, including with a 10kg stone upon her head, which must remain in place until the tantric is satisfied that she is telling the truth. This ritual can reportedly take months to complete, under the belief that a Goddess will reveal the truth. If in the end, the rape victim passes the test, then no one can banish or condemn her; if not, then she is considered “impure” and is ostracized from the community, along with her extended family members.
BIO: Rebecca
Kiessling is an attorney and international pro-life speaker, conceived in
rape. She’s the founder and president of Save
The 1 and co-founder of Hope
After Rape Conception.
But what if
you learned the rest of the story? What
if there is more to these stories than is initially being reported? This
particular pregnant rape survivor’s treatment is amongst the worst I’ve ever
read or heard, and it completely demonstrates why abortion is not the answer,
and how we need a complete cultural shift worldwide in how pregnant rape
victims are treated, and how a child conceived in rape should be welcomed and accepted.
According
to the petition for abortion, the married 24 year old from Botad, India and
mother of two other children, alleged that her husband had abandoned her and
wanted her to terminate the 28-week pregnancy at any cost. But two months later and ready to deliver, her
husband stands by her and she now says that part of her wanted to keep her
unborn child, but her fate and the baby’s was in the hands of 100-200 people
from her community. So as with most
pregnant rape survivors, she didn’t really want the abortion to begin with, but
was under pressure from those close to her and from her community!
Her in-laws
have shunned her, and because her husband is standing by her, he is now outcast
from his own family. To make matters
worse, their community is requiring her to go through a “purification ritual”or
test with a tantric – a type of high
priest known for black magic. Tantrics
have administered “justice” in the community long before the courts and police
were ever established.
Her own parents are supporting this
purification test out of fear for what will happen to them and their two other
yet unmarried children once she gives birth to this child conceived out of
rape. If the tantric doesn’t clear her,
then her siblings will never be able to marry. The ritualistic test involves the tantric interrogating the rape victim, then testing her veracity “by taking a pinch of barley seeds from a bag and asking her to say whether the number of seeds in his hand are even-numbered or odd.” She is then repeatedly subjected to this process, including with a 10kg stone upon her head, which must remain in place until the tantric is satisfied that she is telling the truth. This ritual can reportedly take months to complete, under the belief that a Goddess will reveal the truth. If in the end, the rape victim passes the test, then no one can banish or condemn her; if not, then she is considered “impure” and is ostracized from the community, along with her extended family members.
Not only
does she have to endure this grueling process within her community, she is
also currently seeking help from the Chief Minister of a law enforcement agency
because she says that the local police is protecting her primary rapist who
held her captive for 250 days – 8 months, because he is wealthy and influential. Thus far, she has not been able to obtain
justice through law enforcement. Not only has he not been arrested, but she and
her mother received threats from his bodyguard.
When
denying the abortion in mid-April, the High Court judge did grant her and her
family police protection.
In addition,
the Court appointed a “Collector” to “ensure that proper medical facilities are
provided,” that “the child is delivered safely” and “shall also see to it that
after the delivery, the child is looked after well and is not abandoned in any
manner. If necessary, the Collector can
avail of the services of any NGO or any other government social organization in
any manner.”
The language
from the High Court is encouraging;
however, India has a deplorable track record in obtaining any justice
for rape victims. In fact, in February
of this year – while she was in captivity, the Supreme
Court of India sparked international outrage when it ruled that there is no
such thing as marital rape in India – a nation where daughters are sold to
the highest bidder because dowry is still practiced and marriages are commonly arranged. In the case at-hand, the rapist obtained her
thumb print on a notary, and used a tantric to pronounce her married to the
rapist, since they were well aware of the recent high court ruling. None of those involved – from the notary to
the tantric to the multiple rapists – have been arrested or even sought and
named by the local police.
Yet, while
the rapist and his accomplices run free, many would argue that the innocent
child should have been punished by being put to death. The relevant law in India is the Medical
Termination of Pregnancy Act (MTPA) which does not permit abortion beyond 20
weeks, on the grounds that late-term abortions are dangerous for a woman’s
health. Gujurat High Court Justice J B
Pardiwala cited the fact that her life would be in peril with a 28-week
abortion, then added the following: “A child in her womb by a woman as a result of conception
through an act of rape is not only extremely traumatic for her but humiliating,
frightening and psychologically devastating and as a human being, more particularly in the Indian
society, she becomes an object of scorn and ostracisation. This is very unfortunate.”
But this
Justice recognized that abortion is not the answer, and as cited above, he took
the necessary steps to see that she would have solid health care, and that the
child would be nurtured and protected.
Therein lies the solution.
Can you imagine
if instead of enacting laws with rape exceptions, legislators instead passed
laws providing for special medical care for the delivery of rape-conceived
children, and for the appointment of someone like the “Collector” in India who
would ensure that these children and their mothers are properly cared for and not
ostracized or abandoned? That’s the
answer. Punish rapists, not babies and
their rape survivor mothers. Protect
babies and their mothers – not rapists.
How hard it that to understand?
Monday, June 1, 2015
President Signs Rape Survivor Child Custody Act Into Law! by Rebecca Kiessling
After passing the U.S. Senate 99 to 0, our model legislation from Hope After Rape Conception -- the Rape Survivor Child Custody Act (H.R. 1257) -- was signed into law by President Obama on Friday! Our co-founders from HARC, Shauna Prewitt and Analyn Megison worked very hard on this, working closely with House sponsor Congresswoman Debbie Wasserman-Schultz (D) and Senate sponsors Sen. Sherrod Brown (D) and Sen. Kelly Ayotte (R).
The Act provides an incentive to states to pass legislation providing for a means to terminate the parental rights of rapists, using the "clear and convincing evidence” standard from the U.S Supreme Court case of Santosky v Kramer. 25% of the grant funds are to be allocated to the STOP Violence Against Women Formula Grant Program, and 75% of funds go to the Sexual Assault Services Program. The text of the Act reads that it: "Directs the Attorney General to make grants to states that have in place a law that allows the mother of any child that was conceived through rape to seek court-ordered termination of the parental rights of her rapist with regard to that child, which the court shall grant upon clear and convincing evidence of rape."
In Analyn's home state of Florida, she got the legislature to pass this legislation unanimously, which is how Wasserman-Schultz heard of our model legislation. Several states are currently working to pass this law, including Michigan and Maryland, while some states' legislation, like Pennsylvania, are insufficient because those bills require a rape conviction.
Both Shauna and Analyn had to fight their rapists for custody. Shauna is a practicing attorney who I met when I spoke at Georgetown Law while she was attending. Analyn is a law grad too.
Another board member, Angela Grogg, has been working on getting our model legislation passed in many states, ever since her family endured a court battle fighting her 14 year old daughter's rapist for custody.
Several members of Save The 1 who were conceived in rape suffered molestation by their rapist fathers because they were not protected by law, including Darlene Pawlik and Rowena Slusser. Other women from our organization, such as Robyn McLean and Darlene Pawlik's mom, were repeatedly raped as their rapist used contact with the child to continue raping her. As you may expect, women associated with our organization are celebrating as this news came out!
We encourage every pro-life organization to get behind this legislation, as Right to Life of Michigan is currently championing this bill. Not only is it pro-life in effect -- because pregnant rape victims will be more likely to choose life if they know they'll be protected from the rapist, but you'll be able to demonstrate that you really care about these women and their children, and you'll also have the advantage of seeing rape survivor mothers testifying before the legislature at a time when legislators walls are down. Just think of how powerful it is for rape-exception legislators and pro-choice legislators to hear the testimonies of these rape survivors and the love they have for their children -- just wanting them to be protected.
Only a couple of states have this clear and convincing evidence standard, and many states still have nothing at all. With this new law from Congress, it's the perfect time to begin working with your state legislators to properly protect rape survivor mothers and their children.
BIO: Rebecca Kiessling is an attorney and national pro-life speaker who was conceived in rape. She's the president and founder of Save The 1 and co-founder of Hope After Rape Conception.Friday, May 15, 2015
Congress' Rape Exception Gave Pro-Abort Dems the Floor on the Rape Debate by Jim Sable
Since HR36, Congress’ Pain Capable Unborn Child
Protection Act, did not follow solid pro-life principles, (a discriminatory rape/incest
exception was included), debate on the floor of the House of Representatives
resulted in some unintended consequences.
Did anyone else notice this? The
Democratic Party representatives -- the radically pro-abortion House members
who testified in opposition to HR36, went on and on, speaker after speaker,
presenting their sympathetic case that abortion is compassionate and protective of
women after rape conception. We are armed with the truth of what it takes to support a woman through her trauma after rape while also protecting her baby, so wasn't their rant on rape painful to listen to? The pro-abort Democrats' opinion is that the rape exception, as revised for the current bill, is still
too restrictive. They would make the
same objections to a bill without a rape and incest exception, but this time, there was no counter-argument.
Our pro-life legislators had no rebuttal to
this. Why? Because the bill has a rape exception, so how
could they argue about wanting to protect children like me who were conceived in rape? How could they argue for our humanity? How could they argue the truth that rape
victims are worse off after an abortion and survivors like my birthmother are better off after giving birth?
All that the pro-life side was left with was an abstract,
logic-defying counter-argument suggesting that it is the rape exception in the
bill which protects women’s health -- a similar argument to one which was used
to promote the bill in the weeks preceding the vote. Most of the pro-life legislators avoided
discussing the exception entirely. Understand that because
of the added rape exception, it was impossible to discuss any cases of mothers from
rape/incest or rape/incest-conceived individuals which tell positive,
life-affirming stories of hope and redemption which would overwhelm the
darkness contained in the testimony of the Democrats!
It certainly is not logical to attempt to defend the
lives of the rape-conceived or to encourage mothers to choose life after
conceiving through rape, while at the same time promoting a rape exception and guaranteeing
the right to abortion after rape conception in our own “pro-life” sponsored
law! As you can see, when the bill is
allowing abortion after a rape conception -- when our side is actually setting up
the process by which an abortion after rape conception can be acquired -- the
option of bringing life-affirming stories to legislative debate is eliminated and the opposition gets to dominate the debate on this topic.
Were there no rape exception, truly pro-life
Congressmen would be free and able to completely defeat the false claims that
an abortion is the compassionate response to rape conception. However “instructive” some on our side think
the HR36 bill is, whatever opportunity we have to make a sympathetic case for the
humanity of the unborn late-term baby, is wholly negated by the pro-abortion
Democrats’ continuous talk of the tragedy of the raped and pregnant woman. From their perspective, they had their own sympathy element to
highlight. With the rape exception in
the bill, pro-life Congressmen could do nothing to
counteract that.
I hope this really is
instructional – for the pro-life side. Pro-Life Congressmen need to stick to principle and focus on punishing rapists, not babies.
BIO: Jim Sable,
conceived in rape, is a husband, father of 3, and pro-life speaker and blogger for Save The 1. He’s a Board Member of Save The 1 and Board
Member of Hope After Rape
Conception. His story is featured in
the DVDs “Except in Cases of Rape? 12
Stories of Survival,” and “Conceived
in Rape and Other Exceptions.”
Wednesday, May 13, 2015
She Was "Sad and Skeptical About Rape Babies" by Rebecca Kiessling
Why should I have to prove my worth and my right to life? When I first learned at the age of 18 that I
was conceived in rape, I instantly felt targeted and devalued by our society
because I’d heard what people said about pregnancy “in cases of rape.” Right away, I felt I was in a position where
I would have to justify my own existence – that I would have to prove myself to
the world that I shouldn’t have been aborted and that I was worthy of living.
BIO: Rebecca Kiessling was conceived in rape and nearly aborted, but legally protected by law in Michigan pre-Roe v Wade. She's an attorney, pro-life speaker and blogger, and President of Save The 1. Her own website is www.rebeccakiessling.com
I’ve since found my own value, identity and
purpose in Christ, being created by God, in His image, and for a purpose, so I
no longer feel I need to prove my worth to others in order to feel worthy. Instead, I share my worth out of gratitude
for my own life being spared and in order that others may see the value of those
who are still at risk – those who are in harm’s way as yet unborn and being
targeted for abortion in the clinics, in legislation, and in people’s hearts
and minds.
Whenever I speak, I share this aspect of my
journey, but people are shocked to hear that I actually do get challenged to
prove my value, to demonstrate my positive contribution to society and to justify my right not to have been aborted. This recent e-mail is a
case in point. It was a tough inquiry to
receive, but you’ll see my hopefully patient (and prayerful) responses below,
and the ultimate outcome of the exchange:
I’m feeling sad and
skeptical about rape babies. I’d love to
consider myself pro-life due to biblical reasons, but I just don’t really see
what good can ever come out of a rape baby.
I still think that it sometimes furthers the victimization of a rape
victim. And it’s also because I’m very
sad and disturbed by your blog.
I just think
sometimes that it would be better if these babies never existed -- that every
single one would naturally be miscarried by God’s will, so no one could bully
them for their skeleton in their closet. Like I said, the subject manner disturbs
me to the point where I vomit. I wish that every child was conceived in love
and not violence because that's the way it should be. And I'm sad to say that the only way I could
fully believe all of you rape mothers and children is if you were to pray for
the peace of God that transcends all my futile understanding and my volatile,
overly-sensitive emotions.
There is no story in
the whole world that can fully change my mind. The only way I could ever is if
I were to befriend a victim or become the Bride of a man whom was the product
of abuse. I'm so sorry to be brutally
honest; it's just that my heart grieves to the point where I feel the struggle
to overcome the sin of prejudice. I'm so
angry at God that he allows this to occur.
Dear __, I appreciate
you going to our blog and taking the time to reach out to us. Your
concerns are the most common, but research shows that rape victims are four
times more likely to die within the next year after the abortion vs. giving
birth. Dr. David Reardon's book Victims and Victors:
Speaking Out About Their Pregnancies, Abortions and Children Resulting
From Sexual Assault explains this: http://www.amazon.com/Victims-Victors-Pregnancies-Abortions-Resulting/dp/0964895714.
So it's a myth which gets perpetuated -- that a rape victim would be better off
after an abortion, that her child would be a reminder of the rape, and that she
would even see her child as a "rape baby," as you put it.
I understand a lot of what you're saying. You would definitely feel differently if you
knew someone personally. I wished I wasn’t
conceived in rape, but I do believe now that God definitely bring good out of
evil, and uses tragic situations to bring healing. He doesn't intend the evil of course, but his
trademark is redeeming really awful situations.
-- Rebecca
Her reply (again, challenging for me to read,
but I think she candidly articulates a lot of what most people really wonder or
think):
What has God done in your life personally besides this blog
that has made your tragic family life worth the pain? Tell me what you have been doing: like
marriage, dating, children, jobs, friendship, volunteer work; any of that. I am curious to see how God has given your
life joy and purpose. I'm sorry if I
have ever been difficult to handle. I'm
emotionally impulsive when I hear something sad.
First of all, my birthmother
and her husband legally adopted me 3-1/2 years ago because my adoptive family
was really screwed up (long story of abuse and abandonment.) My own
adoption by my birthmother was our fairy-tale ending. She says I'm a
blessing to her, I honor her and I bring her healing! I love adoption -- my two oldest are adopted
(very open adoption,) and we adopted a baby with special needs -- Cassie -- who
died in our arms at 33 days old. It was an honor to take care of her and
was definitely one of the most important things I'd ever done in my life.
She died because of medical malpractice.
Married for nearly 17
years, we have 5 children now – two adopted sons and our three biological
daughters. Here's my son's story: http://www.lifenews.com/2014/08/29/my-teen-mom-was-a-convicted-drug-user-should-i-have-been-aborted/
He wrote it last September at 12 years old.
Besides being the
president and founder of Save The 1, I also co-founded Hope After Rape
Conception. I'm a family law attorney, though I closed my law
practice to have my children and to home school until 2-1/2 years ago.
I make baby quilts which
I donate to pregnancy resource centers and I give to moms in unplanned
pregnancies. My birthmother taught me to sew! I also taught
my children to quilt, as well as many of my friends and their children.
I've volunteered with orphan care, Sunday school, feeding the disadvantaged, free
legal work, volunteer work for a maternity home, and helping in various ways with
pregnancy resource centers. I changed the hearts of Gov. Rick Perry and
Newt Gingrich on this issue during their presidential campaigns!
A large part of what I do is helping others to understand their
value, identity and worth because lots of people struggle with these issues --
not just those conceived in rape. I hope
this helps! -- Rebecca
Her final response – from someone who said “there is no story in
the world that can fully change my mind”:
Dear Rebecca, thank you so much for your time to
straighten out my emotional acting out -- I'm really glad you told me about
your life. I really think I'll be okay
now. I still wish that men wouldn't
rape, but at least the world knows a lot more than they used to and I can say
that I'm pro-life to my college professors without paranoia or anxiety. I even
talked about helping people like you with my mom and dad. They told me I'm too sensitive in personality
to be involved directly in domestic politics; yet, I'm praying about being a
free English tutor for troubled families as well as being an anti-pornography informant
or activist. After all, the porn
industry has been statistically linked to the sexual violence pandemic. I'm so glad that you are living life well and
to the best of your ability; keep telling people that just because your birth
father was an evil scumbag doesn't mean that you are. Thanks Rebecca, you have
really touched and strengthened my heart. With much sincerity.
Tuesday, March 3, 2015
God’s Plan Trumps Murphy’s Law – Our Journey for Justice! by Robyn McLean
It all started with a text:
“Can you drive five hours to Santa
Fe to testify before the NM Judiciary Committee on Friday?”
So Friday morning, Rebecca had a radio interview on an
Albuquerque Christian Station – KDAZ with Dan Rosecrans who said at the end of
the interview – on the air -- that he felt that he and other pro-life activists
and Christians owed Rebecca and others like her an apology for having been
willing to compromise on the lives of those conceived in rape. Before leaving our hotel, the concierge asked
to take a photo of Rowena with her “Conceived in Rape/Incest – I Love My Life!”
sign, telling us how moved she was. Then
we had an interview with a local newspaper reporter at the “Roundhouse” – New
Mexico’s Capitol. We could see how God
was already at work!
While I was at the hotel, Rebecca and Rowena dropped off lit
pieces with their stories off at the Governor’s office, as well as the bill
sponsors, and had the opportunity to speak with the sponsor of the parental
notification bill – Rep. Baldanado. He
said he doesn’t like exceptions, but that he wasn’t going to take them out
because he felt the pro-life Democrats in the Senate wouldn’t approve the bill
with them in it. However, he did say
he’d like to work with Save The 1 in the future to try to educate legislators
on this issue more. Then Rebecca asked
if he would sponsor the model legislation from Hope After Rape Conception – to
terminate the parental rights of rapists.
As it turns out, he sponsored such legislation last year, and introduced
us to the Representative who was behind the bill and who had just re-introduced
it this legislative session! Rebecca and
I got to take photos with Rep. Conrad James, she reviewed his bill, suggested
tweaks to it, and the two of them are going to work together to have rape
survivor moms there to testify so the bill doesn’t get killed again this year
by legislators who don’t think it really happens – that rapists sue for custody
or that rape survivor moms actually have their children, love them and choose
to raise them! So we just kept seeing
God’s providence in having us there.
I gave my testimony
of having become pregnant by rape from an abusive relationship, and that I
believed my son had just as equal value as any other baby worth
protecting. Democrats and liberals who
know me, couldn’t imagine my life without him, see him as valuable and special,
and wouldn’t wish his life non-existent. I proceeded to say how much I valued all their
lives were no matter their mistakes, circumstances, backgrounds, etc.. I ended with saying, "Your life has
value, and so does my son's, no matter how it happened." Mission
accomplished – our voices were heard!
Rebecca Kiessling, a dear friend of mine and Founder and
President of Save the 1 -- for which I am a pro-life speaker and writer, wanted
me to go to a hearing on two bills being presented to protect unborn children
which has exceptions of babies conceived in rape – exceptions not typically
included at the state level in late-term abortion bans and parental
notification laws. Rebecca was conceived
from rape, and so was my sweet son.
Therefore, we have an even deeper, personal passion in protecting other
children coming from similar circumstances.
Earlier, I didn’t have much in the budget for a trip like
that, but I had just received some income that week from my website-building
business. Rebecca was able to make the
trip because a Facebook friend of hers whom she’d never met had donated the
frequent flyer miles in response to Rebecca’s plea in a status update. I said I was a “go” if I could bring my 4
year old son AJ and if she would be willing to fly into Denver, trek to
Colorado Springs, and drive us down to Santa Fe, since I’m a stay-at-home mom
and was uncomfortable doing the driving for a long, unfamiliar trip, especially
with the snow we were expecting in Colorado Springs. I knew the snow may be bad in town, but thought
how bad could it be if Rebecca and I both from the upper Midwest? Plus,
the forecast for the rest of the trip was all clear – when we checked.
Our obstacles to take off for this cause started early on
when I went to put gas in the car. I
didn’t know much about the car my husband and I just purchased, though he tried
to tell me it wouldn’t drive as well as the other cars in snow. Again, I thought, “Hey, I am from Minnesota
and drive in crazy North Dakota weather conditions where we had high snow and
icicles into May, so I can do this.”
NOT. I discovered my car was not
an option for even picking up Rebecca in Denver after snow was dumped on us and
I crashed into a curb on a turn, then
got stuck on a hill where I had to be rescued by my husband. So Rebecca needed to take the Colorado
Springs Shuttle, and had to rent a car – which I said I’d split the cost with
her. Rebecca would have to make the 10:30
shuttle on a 10:04 arrival, or it would be another two hours. Her flight was delayed 15 minutes, but the
shuttle company said they’d give her until 10:45. She just barely made it!
As it turns out, it was a good thing she didn’t plan to rent
a car in Denver, because her credit card was lost and had her husband’s which
wouldn’t suffice for renting a car! My
husband secured the rental with Rebecca as a driver, costing us all more of course. When she arrived with the rental to pick me
and AJ up, we got stuck in the parking lot – three times! We were exhausted after much shoveling,
pushing, ice-chipping, and grueling work, and we hadn’t even left the parking
lot!" More than two hours later
than originally estimated, we finally hit the road.
Most of our trip was through blustery snow and extreme
blizzard conditions. We saw traveling
vehicles in ditches and a few wrecks, so we took extra caution, finally
arriving in Santa Fe at 10 p.m., after
11 hours of driving for Rebecca, when it should have been 7 hours in clear
conditions. Just four miles from the
highway, there was not a single snowflake in Santa Fe! We celebrated our arrival with Save The 1
Board Member Dyanne Gonzales and conceived in rape speaker/writer Rowena
Slusser , both of whom are from New Mexico.
We made it! If we had known what
our journey would have been like, we never would had planned to go -- Rebecca
definitely would not have flown into Denver first, but we knew in that moment
that God had a plan for us to be there!
As it turns out though, there was a terrible storm in Albuquerque the
next morning – highways closed, and Rebecca never would have made it 45 minutes
away in Santa Fe if she’d flown into Albuquerque that morning – which she would
have done if I hadn’t agreed to go! The
airport may have even been closed that morning.
So Friday morning, Rebecca had a radio interview on an
Albuquerque Christian Station – KDAZ with Dan Rosecrans who said at the end of
the interview – on the air -- that he felt that he and other pro-life activists
and Christians owed Rebecca and others like her an apology for having been
willing to compromise on the lives of those conceived in rape. Before leaving our hotel, the concierge asked
to take a photo of Rowena with her “Conceived in Rape/Incest – I Love My Life!”
sign, telling us how moved she was. Then
we had an interview with a local newspaper reporter at the “Roundhouse” – New
Mexico’s Capitol. We could see how God
was already at work!
AJ was over-stimulated at the Roundhouse, so Rebecca took me
and AJ to the hotel to unwind, and I began looking into some type of child care
for a few hours, so I could testify without him being uncomfortable sitting for
several hours . I was told we could
possibly lose our spot in the hearing room if we had to step out. However, the fees were prohibitive. I prayed for a pastor's family, or someone
connected in a similar way, who could watch AJ, and that he could have a fun
time, not something boring, but something special. Feeling a bit hopeless at the hotel about
taking the grueling trip only to not be able to testify at the hearing, I made
the decision to put it in God's hands -- everything that had happened was
already a blessing, and I was just going to enjoy my time with AJ. I knew He'd make a way if He wanted me to be
there. Not long after I prayed and put
it in His hands, Rebecca called me and put a lady on the phone. She kindly introduced herself -- a pastor's
wife, home schooling mother of four, and
actively involved in children's ministries!
Whoa! After talking a bit with
her, I knew she was perfect and everything I was hoping for -- patient and
sweet. I told her that I had just pretty
much prayed specifically for her. With an
exchange of the car set, she brought me to the Roundhouse and took AJ with two
of her children for an amazingly fun time for him
While I was at the hotel, Rebecca and Rowena dropped off lit
pieces with their stories off at the Governor’s office, as well as the bill
sponsors, and had the opportunity to speak with the sponsor of the parental
notification bill – Rep. Baldanado. He
said he doesn’t like exceptions, but that he wasn’t going to take them out
because he felt the pro-life Democrats in the Senate wouldn’t approve the bill
with them in it. However, he did say
he’d like to work with Save The 1 in the future to try to educate legislators
on this issue more. Then Rebecca asked
if he would sponsor the model legislation from Hope After Rape Conception – to
terminate the parental rights of rapists.
As it turns out, he sponsored such legislation last year, and introduced
us to the Representative who was behind the bill and who had just re-introduced
it this legislative session! Rebecca and
I got to take photos with Rep. Conrad James, she reviewed his bill, suggested
tweaks to it, and the two of them are going to work together to have rape
survivor moms there to testify so the bill doesn’t get killed again this year
by legislators who don’t think it really happens – that rapists sue for custody
or that rape survivor moms actually have their children, love them and choose
to raise them! So we just kept seeing
God’s providence in having us there.
After being seated
with Rebecca in the hearing room, I was calm as the sweet pastor’s wife kept in
touch, updating me on how AJ was doing --
enjoying a kids meal with her two children who he came to adore, and he was
off to have more fun! I relaxed and
focused on what God had for me to say to these legislators.
But then, yet another obstacle: we learned they made a list for those who were
allowed to testify, which we were told was an unusual thing. We were NOT on that list. Rowena has been
warned to be quiet by a legislator after she testified a week prior, and things
were said to Rebecca to suggest that she should not try to disrupt things by
insisting that the rape exception be removed.
And now, it appeared that they were succeeding in silencing us before
the committee. But our new friend
Lorenzo Espinosa – a no-compromise pro-life activist from New Mexico, leaned
over to us and said, "This is New Mexico.
I got this!" We didn't quite
know what he meant by that – whether he would cause a scene, so we sat there
awaiting the moment. I just knew I was
not accepting that we miraculously pushed through so many obstacles, close
calls, and had very specific needs met, only to find out we were not able to
testify. Again, I just started
praying. I believed we were there for
more, and I prayed God would create an opportunity!
One member of the short list to testify was Alan Sanchez
with the Bishop’s office. We sat there
shocked when he testified that it was moral and right for a Catholic legislator
to vote for the bill with the rape exception because of EV 73 (Pope John Paul
II’s Evangelium Vitae.) Rebecca had just
debated this issue with him by phone only a couple of hours earlier. She told him about her radio interview with Cardinal
Dolan on the Catholic Channel one month ago when he agreed with Rebecca,
calling it “preposterous” to suggest that EV 73 justifies any legislator or
leader to support a bill which discriminates against an entire class of
persons. But Alan Sanchez replied that
he serves the Bishops in New Mexico and not Cardinal Dolan. He refused to answer her hypothetical
question of whether it’d be right – under EV 73 – for a Catholic legislator in
Lebanon to support a bill banning abortion except in cases of Catholic
babies. It was extremely sad to watch a
church leader defend discrimination.
After the pro-life
list of witnesses was completed, the bill sponsor explained that their expert witness
was running late due to weather and would arrive in about 10 minutes. Lorenzo immediately used this opportunity and
stood up with a plea to the committee Chairman that Rebecca had traveled all
the way from Michigan to testify, explaining that she’s a national pro-life speaker,
leader and attorney. He requested that she
be able to speak while we waited for the expert witness, and the Chairman
shrugged his shoulders and said, “Sure!” I knew Rebecca wanted me up there, and so I frantically
asked her, "What do I do?! Do I go up with you?" She motioned me to
and whispered, “Come on!” So, I follow
her up there.
Rebecca introduced herself, explained the mission of Save
The 1, pointing to me as a mother from rape, and sharing her testimony of
having been conceived in rape, but alive today because she was protected by
Michigan’s law before Roe v Wade. She
explained why they should not discriminate, why children conceived in rape
don’t deserve the death penalty, and urged them to amend the bill to remove the
discriminatory exceptions. Watch here.
The expert witness arrived before she finished, and I
thought, "Oh no, I hope they let me speak!" Rebecca finished, I stepped forward to speak
into the mic, but the “gatekeeper” went to grab my mic, and I thought, “He’s
not going to let me speak!” Instead, he
turned to me, smiled and said, “Here, let me adjust that for you.” God’s providence again!
I gave my testimony
of having become pregnant by rape from an abusive relationship, and that I
believed my son had just as equal value as any other baby worth
protecting. Democrats and liberals who
know me, couldn’t imagine my life without him, see him as valuable and special,
and wouldn’t wish his life non-existent. I proceeded to say how much I valued all their
lives were no matter their mistakes, circumstances, backgrounds, etc.. I ended with saying, "Your life has
value, and so does my son's, no matter how it happened." Mission
accomplished – our voices were heard!
We sat and watched as the committee members debated the
bill. One Democrat pro-choice legislator
pointed out the hypocrisy that the pro-life legislators were willing to
compromise on the rape exception, but then he said something strange while
looking at us – that this issue doesn’t poll well, and politicians care about
polls. Another surreal moment was when
the bill sponsor explained to committee members that it would be unjust
discrimination to have exceptions for babies with special needs – but he didn’t
see his own discrimination! Finally,
they took the vote, and it was disheartening to watch them approve the
late-term abortion ban, with the rape and incest exceptions included.
The sweet pastor's wife who watched AJ, treating him to a
good time, came and got me after the hearing and brought us back to the hotel. The others stayed for the hearing on the
parental notification bill. I tried to
pay her, but she kindly and adamantly refused; she just wanted to help and
bless us. AJ gave her daughter a big hug
after she brought up his car seat to our room.
After the second hearing, Rebecca, Rowena and Dyanne were
all treated to sandwiches at the Roundhouse by Lorenzo and his friend
Alan. Not only did further connections
take place between them and several other pro-life activists and NM leaders,
but Lorenzo's patron of his pro-life ministry, Alan, gave Rebecca an envelope
with an apology note to her and others like her. He was pro-life, but willing to compromise on
the rape exception -- until he watched
the DVD with Lorenzo the night before,
“Conceived in Rape and Other Exceptions,” featuring Rebecca and other member s
of Save The 1. His heart and perception changed that they were just as human
and valuable as any other baby worth protecting, and he understood why
compromise is wrong.
After giving Rebecca his apology note, he asked her,
"How much was your car rental?"
He ended up coming back three times, asking about meals, the shuttle,
gas, parking – ultimately covering all of our trip expenses! Rebecca was so grateful – in tears as she
told me of God’s provision! Both of us were funding the trip with our own
money, aside from the donated frequent flyer miles and the rooms being donated
by Dyanne and her husband. My expenses
were going to come from what I had just earned that week. I couldn’t wait to tell my husband, and to
share this blog with you all – a story of seeking justice, sacrificing, speaking
out, and relying upon God’s provision!
As we relished everything we plowed through and all that had
been provided, we enjoyed a sisterly time back at the hotel, laughing well into
the night. In the morning, we had fellowship
with Lorenzo, Alan and another friend of theirs, discussing pro-life strategy
in-depth. Rowena’s husband and children
came to pick her up, and we had a nice time with them. Rebecca filmed Dyanne’s pro-life testimony as
she shared her story with all of us. We said our goodbyes, having had an
incredibly bonding time of activism and fellowship.
Rebecca and I still had a long journey back. The forecast was good, but we were low on
gas, so backtracked south to a gas station.
Who happened to be in the car right next to us as we pulled into the gas
station? Dyanne! Yet another providential moment.
We had clear skies almost all of the way back to the
Colorado Springs airport to return the rental car, but my husband’s right tire
blew out on the highway on his way to pick us up and he didn’t have a jack in
my new car. So Rebecca and I came to him,
and he changed the tire with the rental car jack. Were the obstacles finally over? No! The
next morning, as we were taking Rebecca to the airport, she tried checking in
on her smartphone, but the airline said there was no reservation! She
was worried the flight was overbooked. At
the airport kiosk, she got the same message.
But at the counter, her reservation was there – phew!
We had a wonderful trip full of obstacles, but filled with purpose,
bonding, provision, and fulfillment. It
was like God’s plan was consistently overcoming Murphy’s Law! Most of all though, this trip was made because
we care about seeking justice and protecting all, and we know that we pierced
the darkness and this is just the beginning of a shift in the pro-life culture
of New Mexico.
BIO: Robyn McLean is an inspirational speaker and
writer on a wide spectrum, builds websites, and enjoys sharing coffee-time with people. She is a wife and mother and resides in
Colorado Springs, Colorado. Learn more
about her, and her personal story of having become pregnant by rape at www.RobynMcLean.net, and stay connected on Facebook: www.facebook.com/CoffeeWithRobynMcLean. Robyn is a blogger and
national pro-life speaker for SaveThe 1.
Thursday, February 26, 2015
Will My Silence Save Babies? ~By Mary Rathke
With the recent debate in the New Mexico HB 390 Late-term Abortion Ban a fellow conceived in rape woman I know, was asked to be silent. She was told that her silence would save 95% of the babies that are killed in late term abortions. These politicians must assume that a woman who is desperate enough to receive a late term abortion will not lie about being raped to receive a way out of her current situation. Will my silence about being conceived in rape and being worthy of life really save 95% or will the “wink, wink-just say you were raped” approach of the abortion backers make that number 90%, 80% or even 50%? We don’t really know do we? Except we do know Norma McCorvey admitted she lied about being raped and that was why she needed an abortion. Many feel this was “an important point in the fact pattern of the Roe v. Wade case.”
Pictured here, I spoke out at a press conference in Lansing, MI December 2013 and the bill in question was passed without a rape exception. Once we who were conceived in rape spoke out, those asking for the exception immediately stopped insisting there should be an exception. Why? Because they couldn’t say our lives didn’t matter!
Save the 1, a pro-life speaker group of the “exceptions and hard cases” have been told by pro-life strategists not to keep silent but rather to speak out. If we speak out every time a pro-life bill has a rape exception, the pro-life community will finally understand that pro-life bills should not have exceptions put in them, in the first place. Even if the bill is killed initially, because in the long run the realization will come that the bills need to be presented without exceptions. I wish everyone would understand that we don’t need exceptions to pass pro-life bills, Michigan never has. When we as a pro-life community say, “Some life is not valuable,” we value none.
There are many parallel example we can look at, what if the South agreed to no more slavery except for the men over 6 foot tall. “Tall men would be too hard to control if not enslaved, don’t worry we’ll free 95% of the slaves who are under six feet.” Could you imagine if we, as an America people, found that acceptable? Some of our greatest basketball and football players, are very tall African-American men. Can you imagine living in a society where they were still kept as slaves in the South? Of course not, that is ludicrous! But at the time of the Civil War the thought of slavery being overturned was ludicrous to many people, however the abolitionist fought on. They educated the masses, they showed pictures of the brutality of slavery and eventually garnered enough support to overturn laws.
What about today? Should we educate the masses, show them pictures of those conceived in rape and shout from the roof tops their life matters? Unless we can pass a bill that has no exceptions in it, unless we can tell everyone every life matters, unless we can create a ban that does not allow any “wink, wink-lying” we will not have a real opportunity to overturn Roe v Wade. What the masses need to understand is, if a woman has the option of saying she had been raped, she will use that option in a desperate time. She will then live with the guilt of abortion for the rest of her life. The abortion will not end the memories of a rape it will only end a life, how can we live with that?
Can you look at my picture and say my life does not matter?
As an adopted daughter whose birth mother had been raped, Mary Rathke shares that even after a horrible encounter of rape, one can choose life and joy. Mary's story includes her birth mother's experience, how her adopted mother's tragic past was restored through adoption and the tough decisions she faced when her oldest son was born at 1lb 8oz. Mary is a wife, and mother of four children. She is a licensed minster and speaks monthly at the Good Samaritan Rescue Mission Chapel. She is a Savethe1 Director of the Board and the President of HELPeople, INC. She has been a part of the International March for Life Leadership conference in Rome, Italy and is endorsed by Dr James Dobson.
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