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Showing posts with label Conceived Out of Rape. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Conceived Out of Rape. Show all posts
Sunday, January 10, 2016
Petulant or Vigilant? The Battle For No Exceptions – By Jim Sable
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| Petulant or Vigilant? The Battle For No Exceptions – By Jim Sable |
A new year of battling abortion begins, which means another year of fearless pro-life people fervently working to stop abortion has ended. You could call any year that passes without stopping abortion an unsuccessful year, but there were many successes in 2015, particularly: The Center for Medical Progress investigative videos and related rallies exposing the profiting from the sale of aborted fetal body parts by Planned Parenthood and the abortion industry; pro-life efforts by our friend Abby Johnson and her ministry team at And Then There Were None assisting abortion workers in leaving the industry continued, with many abortionists and workers quitting; certain pro-life laws and related efforts were successful in causing either the outright closure or cessation of abortion services at 53 clinics throughout the USA; and, the continuing work of Pregnancy Resource Centers combined with sidewalk counselors, bolstered by the compassionate and visible international efforts of 40 Days For Life, tirelessly working at abortion’s “ground zero”, quietly saved countless lives.
At Save The 1, we experienced other successes, as our network of individuals representing one of the so-called “hard cases” expanded into the hundreds. We helped start our affiliate group Save The 1 - Carry To Birth. We launched our international outreach with the Save The 1 Spanish and Portuguese divisions: Salvar El 1 and Salva O 1. We witnessed our message spreading and the topic of the rape exception discussed more frequently. We also observed, and in some cases directly influenced, the introduction and passage of many State abortion regulating laws that did not contain the usual “exceptions”. We assisted worldwide to keep the rape exception out of important pro-life laws.
But, along with those positive 2015 results, as we at Save The 1 represent and defend the lives of the so-called “hard cases” of the abortion debate, we continue to witness and experience many verbal and written challenges to the right to life of the “exceptions”, from individuals and groups on both sides of the debate. Each challenge is a slap in the face, and we turn the other cheek while we continue to defend our lives and the lives of those similarly situated. We have turned the other cheek so often that our heads are spinning. It is not difficult to understand the disrespect from the abortion supporters, but when we battle with the pro-life community, it is particularly perplexing and exasperating.
A recent example of this occurred as 2015 was winding down and the 2016 Presidential campaign was gaining momentum. The pro-life community reacted in unison to denounce a statement made by self-proclaimed pro-life Presidential candidate Jeb Bush. Mr. Bush answered a question about whether he would have ended the life of the infant Hitler. Jeb Bush answered, “Hell yeah I would!”. One well known and influential pro-life blogger railed against Bush in a Facebook post in November, chiding Bush by unequivocally stating that the pro-life community cannot abandon “Principles” and make “Pragmatic Compromises”. Bush’s pragmatic compromise about Hitler is not pro-life. “Once we compromise the principle, we can’t with a straight face appeal to it anymore,” the blogger wrote. (This is a blogger who had previously advocated for laws containing exceptions, defending compromise.)
Save The 1 was encouraged by the post that cited “principles” written by someone who has shown a willingness to compromise on pro-life laws. We reached out to see if the blogger’s idea of principles still included an acceptance of the exceptions. Surely, one who would not condone killing the infant/preborn Hitler would also now be standing by principle and rejecting exceptions, or so we hoped, and communicated that hope in our response to the post. Unfortunately, our hopes were unfounded. Instead of a reassuring affirmation of our right to life, we were told that this blogger was “. . . weary of the fallacy of the 1% argument”, (whatever that means). We were also called “petulant” (3 times) for our no exceptions position and for expressing a challenge to the compromising ideology. So, Save The 1 is apparently petulant for defending all life, but a blogger who responds to a challenge, not by engaging in respectful debate and Q & A on the points, but instead by name calling and misstating another’s views, is somehow virtuous. We, evidently, are not allowed to defend our position, are not allowed to show any passion about our cause lest we be labeled as petulant. Are we to understand this to mean: “Spare the baby Hitler – sacrifice the baby from rape”?
The blogger’s single defense is to claim that the blog has never stated that the rape exception is an acceptable compromise. But, how do you separate an approval of exceptions in law from an approval of exceptions in general? Is it logical to state that you are against the rape exception or that you don’t consider the rape exception an acceptable compromise and then promote and condone the exceptions in law? Can you hold yourself out as “principled” when you accept any compromise?
The promotion of exceptions is troubling enough. But there is also a concurrent promotion of and symbiotic relationship with compromising politicians. The pro-life community has allowed politicians to define what it means to be pro-life. Don’t the elected officials work for us? This has been much more of a problem at the Federal level than the State level. Save The 1 has observed much more success among the states in passing principled laws without exceptions.
This blogger gave us the erroneous example of rejecting hostage releases one at a time until hostage holders agree to release 100% as being analogous to a “no exceptions” requirement for a pro-life law. This hostage scenario is not analogous to a no exceptions legal philosophy because a no exceptions philosophy would accept ALL hostages, one at a time or all at once, depending on the requirements of the hostage takers (abortion regulations). A law with exceptions actually refuses some hostages (babies’ lives). Here’s how: The hostage negotiating team (pro-life community) takes (protects) every life the hostage holders (abortion regulations) are willing to spare, (every life a law is designed to protect), and then, the negotiating team sends those now saved hostages who are rape conceived BACK to the hostage holders, (removes the legal protection for some by adding a rape exception to the law). To put it simply, (and, seemingly, obviously), a law with exceptions excludes some lives, a no exceptions law does not.
We were accused of being responsible, at least partly, for the continued slaughter of 99% of babies because we defend the last 1%. We were told, (and we have heard this many times), we are standing in the way of laws that would save 99% of babies tomorrow because we will not agree to the exceptions. What we do object to is any group or individual who touts a hypothetical law, with imaginary results, who then claims a superior moral authority over others. Our proposal could be considered hypothetical, but we have the historical record of Roe v. Wade to show that the rape exception is unworkable in practice. It is impossible to know how many lives would be saved by an abortion ban with a rape exception, but it is certainly not the outrageous 99% claimed by this blogger. A rape exception creates a huge, unenforceable loophole, and also exposes the real possibility of additional exceptions, which will be advanced and defended as just as valid, merely a court decision away from implementation, as the rape exception is given the force of law by OUR side. The perpetually-promoted rape exception keeps abortion legal forever.
This leads to a broader issue and other questions. We at Save The 1 are told that laws with exceptions need to be passed because they contribute to the “greater good” of ending abortion. Who is the caretaker of the “greater good”? Who gets to decide how we get there, when we will know we are there, and how long it should take to get there? As compromising organizations and individuals advance an exceptions strategy that has almost no chance of ever ending legalized abortion, how is that promoting the greater good? If the rape exception keeps abortion legal forever, allowing for a renewed expansion of abortion rights after a ban with exceptions somehow is passed, how is the long term greater good achieved?
There have been promises for decades that the exceptions strategy will change and the laws passed with exceptions will be fixed. Neither has happened. Case in point: the current Planned Parenthood defunding bill passed by the House and Senate has a rape exception. So, we are handing the enforcement procedure of the rape exception to an organization that has already demonstrated that they do not comply with rape reporting requirements. Is this an effective strategy? Let’s make a commitment to change this strategy. Now. If not now, when?
From our standpoint, the blogger broke at least 2 tenets of debate, (1) - attacking us personally and, (2) - begging the question by assuming something as fact without any defending evidence. These are rules that this blogger claims to uphold (but doesn’t) and demands that others do as well. Here is another example of inconsistency we see often from some compromising pro-life individuals, from those in leadership positions on down. They use a recommended line of reasoning when discussing abortion with those who are “personally pro-life” but supportive of laws allowing the “choice” of abortion by pointing out that the other person, despite his or her personal disapproval of abortion, is actually supporting abortion, the horrible act of killing babies that they claim to abhor, by supporting the legality of killing babies. The “personal pro-lifers” are being inconsistent. In other words, if you support the law, you support the act, despite what you claim are your own personal views. How is accepting the exceptions in law any different? It is puzzling that someone who is pro-life and compromises on the exceptions cannot seem to grasp that they are also displaying the same inconsistency. Again, if you accept the law, you accept the act.
So what is it, actually, that is so distressing about our message to the people who accept exceptions in law? Are they sincere and accurate when they say we are an impediment to pro-life success? In their eyes we are a problem to deal with, a nuisance, a thorn in their side. Or are they concealing something they do not want to admit? Are we actually a challenge to their conscience? Has the business of being pro-life clouded the purity of the message and distracted some away from fighting for the principle of “Every Life Matters”? What percentage would we have to be for the lives of the “hard cases” to matter enough to be defended by everyone at every opportunity and to make legal exceptions to pro-life laws a thing of the past? Apparently 1% is not enough.
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BIO: Jim Sable is a husband, father of three, and a national pro-life speaker, conceived in rape, and blogger for Save The 1, from the Chicago area. He serves on the Board of Save The 1, as well as Hope After Rape Conception.
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Friday, May 15, 2015
My Birthmother Was Raped, But God Had a Plan For Both of Our Lives, by Sherry Hensley
Six years ago while on a trip
home to visit my parents, I had the privilege to take a four-hour drive and
meet a woman who I have come to know and admire her for her selfless love, her strength,
and her act of courage in the middle of adversity -- my birthmother.
Growing up, I always knew I was an adopted child. My parents did not keep it a secret and they loved me no matter if I was born into the family or adopted. My parents told me growing up that when I reached the age of 18, if I wanted to search for my birthparents, they would help me do it.
For many years, I dealt with some medical issues and had a lot of questions which adoptees think about. My adoption was “closed,” but in January of 2008, I decided to get my non-ID information.
The day finally came when the packet arrived in the mail. I was nervous and excited all at the same time. I waited until my husband got home from work to open it. That evening in January of 2008, I opened the packet, and we read it together. I was amazed as to what I was reading. As I read about my birthmother having taught children who had cerebral palsy, I felt so proud of her!
The packet did not give very much information about my birthfather other than on one of the pages in big letters it said, “Alleged Father.” That is when I got the feeling that something bad had happened.
After my husband and I finished reading the information, he told me he wanted for us to get to know my birthmother more, inspiring me to search for her. I called my parents, and I told them that I was going to continue to search for my birthmother.
I wrote my birthmother an outreach statement without any names and emailed it to my caseworker. Several days went by and the days felt more like years. I continued to pray that God would work the situation out because I wanted to know who she was so I could thank her for choosing life.
The day finally came when I received a phone call from my caseworker. She said she had talked with my birthmother, and that she wanted to have contact with me! The caseworker told me that before she could give me all of the information, my birthmother wanted me to know the truth: my birthmother was raped.
The day I heard that I was conceived in rape, I chose not to become angry or bitter about my beginnings, and I chose to love my birthfather. Why did I choose to love my birthfather who is a rapist? Because Jesus Christ died on the cross for my sins, as well as the sins of my birthfather. I chose to love him through the love of Jesus Christ. That day, God also gave to me a heart filled with so much love and compassion for my birthmother for what she’d endured!
It was several weeks later after my birthmother was raped that she discovered she was pregnant. When she told her mother that she was pregnant, her mother was not thrilled with the turn of events and gave my birthmother three weeks to get out of the house. Her father had passed away in 1967 and so no one else was there to protect and defend her.
She then went to live at a home for unwed mothers, and it was there that my birthmother started her healing process. The question went through her mind: what am I to do with this baby? My birthmother had to make a decision. She had no job, no permanent place to live, was not married, and no support from family. My birthfather, of course, was out of the picture. In fact, she didn’t even know my birthfather’s name.
Her aunt though had an idea: she could arrange for her to have an illegal abortion with a doctor in Michigan (this was before Roe V Wade.)
However, my birthmother knew that there was life growing inside of her womb --Life
given by God and a gift from God. My birthmother said her favorite verse is Jeremiah 29:11: “For I know the plans I have for you,”
declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you
hope and a future.” She did not
want to disrupt the plans which God had for the tiny life who was growing
inside of her. When she decided to place
me for adoption, her one request to the social worker was that her baby be placed in a strong Christian home.
When I was born, my birthmother had some complications. We both remained in the hospital for a week before she went home and I was released to my foster parent’s house. God blessed my birthmother with one week to love, care for and hold her baby girl she’d named Rebecca Ann. My birthmother and I were released from the hospital on the same day, and she said she then placed me into the hands of God.
When I got in contact with my birthmother, she told me, “I have always loved you, and you were the beginning of my healing process.” She also said what a lot of people don’t realize – that the baby who is conceived out of rape becomes a strong healing force in the situation. Why? Because out of something horrific and traumatic comes a precious human being, and the Giver of Life brings healing to the one who suffered.
The day I received the information from my caseworker that my birthmother wanted to meet me, a feeling of completeness came over me, as well as a great love which I have for my birthmother.
I sent my birthmother an email the night of Feb 5th. In the morning, I checked my inbox and was excited to see that I had an email from her which included a picture of her and her family. I have a half-brother and a step-sister. We exchanged further emails, and I called her and we chatted for a bit. It was a relief to know we were on the same page. She said, “Okay we need to talk about when we can meet.” My parents and my husband know me well, and that is the exact way that I would have said it! So we worked it out, and we had the day set for May 21st & 22nd, 2008, as I was going to be home to spend some time with my parents for a vacation.
After almost 35 years, the day finally came that my mom, my dad, my husband and I
got to meet my birthmother
and half-brother. We met them at the
hotel where we were staying, sat by the pool chatting, then went to a nice
dinner. My birthmother had my half-brother pray over the food. Well, he prayed
and he also thanked God for the reunion between his mom and her daughter. I about cried because of the immense joy I
felt at that moment.
After dinner, we went to her house, and I got to see pictures of her when she was younger, and I looked so much like her! It was surreal. Genetics are wild.
The next day was wonderful as well, spending the afternoon with her, touring her home town, looking at more photos. She gave me a picture to keep, as well as a copy of the family lineage, which is so precious to have! I felt so blessed to spend time with her like that. I told her I felt I have met an older sister. My birthmother is someone from whom I can learn, and someone who I call my Special Friend. I couldn’t feel more blessed!
Yes, my biological great aunt wanted me to be aborted, but my birthmother chose life, and I was protected by law from an illegal abortion. God was faithful to my birthmother’s prayer: I was raised in a wonderful Christian home where faith was taught, and it was real.
God has been so very good to
me, and He has blessed me beyond measure with amazing parents, a brother who
also is adopted, a loving husband who I
adore so very much, incredible friends and a tight-knit church family. I was conceived in rape, but I am loved.
BIO: Sherry Hensley is pro-life speaker from Maryland – conceived in rape, saved from an illegal abortion, and a blogger for Save The 1. She’s married to a Minister and loves to share her faith and inspire others. Her website is www.thevalueoflife.net
Growing up, I always knew I was an adopted child. My parents did not keep it a secret and they loved me no matter if I was born into the family or adopted. My parents told me growing up that when I reached the age of 18, if I wanted to search for my birthparents, they would help me do it.
For many years, I dealt with some medical issues and had a lot of questions which adoptees think about. My adoption was “closed,” but in January of 2008, I decided to get my non-ID information.
The day finally came when the packet arrived in the mail. I was nervous and excited all at the same time. I waited until my husband got home from work to open it. That evening in January of 2008, I opened the packet, and we read it together. I was amazed as to what I was reading. As I read about my birthmother having taught children who had cerebral palsy, I felt so proud of her!
The packet did not give very much information about my birthfather other than on one of the pages in big letters it said, “Alleged Father.” That is when I got the feeling that something bad had happened.
After my husband and I finished reading the information, he told me he wanted for us to get to know my birthmother more, inspiring me to search for her. I called my parents, and I told them that I was going to continue to search for my birthmother.
I wrote my birthmother an outreach statement without any names and emailed it to my caseworker. Several days went by and the days felt more like years. I continued to pray that God would work the situation out because I wanted to know who she was so I could thank her for choosing life.
The day finally came when I received a phone call from my caseworker. She said she had talked with my birthmother, and that she wanted to have contact with me! The caseworker told me that before she could give me all of the information, my birthmother wanted me to know the truth: my birthmother was raped.
The day I heard that I was conceived in rape, I chose not to become angry or bitter about my beginnings, and I chose to love my birthfather. Why did I choose to love my birthfather who is a rapist? Because Jesus Christ died on the cross for my sins, as well as the sins of my birthfather. I chose to love him through the love of Jesus Christ. That day, God also gave to me a heart filled with so much love and compassion for my birthmother for what she’d endured!
It was several weeks later after my birthmother was raped that she discovered she was pregnant. When she told her mother that she was pregnant, her mother was not thrilled with the turn of events and gave my birthmother three weeks to get out of the house. Her father had passed away in 1967 and so no one else was there to protect and defend her.
She then went to live at a home for unwed mothers, and it was there that my birthmother started her healing process. The question went through her mind: what am I to do with this baby? My birthmother had to make a decision. She had no job, no permanent place to live, was not married, and no support from family. My birthfather, of course, was out of the picture. In fact, she didn’t even know my birthfather’s name.
Her aunt though had an idea: she could arrange for her to have an illegal abortion with a doctor in Michigan (this was before Roe V Wade.)
However, my birthmother knew that there was life growing inside of her womb --Life
When I was born, my birthmother had some complications. We both remained in the hospital for a week before she went home and I was released to my foster parent’s house. God blessed my birthmother with one week to love, care for and hold her baby girl she’d named Rebecca Ann. My birthmother and I were released from the hospital on the same day, and she said she then placed me into the hands of God.
When I got in contact with my birthmother, she told me, “I have always loved you, and you were the beginning of my healing process.” She also said what a lot of people don’t realize – that the baby who is conceived out of rape becomes a strong healing force in the situation. Why? Because out of something horrific and traumatic comes a precious human being, and the Giver of Life brings healing to the one who suffered.
The day I received the information from my caseworker that my birthmother wanted to meet me, a feeling of completeness came over me, as well as a great love which I have for my birthmother.
I sent my birthmother an email the night of Feb 5th. In the morning, I checked my inbox and was excited to see that I had an email from her which included a picture of her and her family. I have a half-brother and a step-sister. We exchanged further emails, and I called her and we chatted for a bit. It was a relief to know we were on the same page. She said, “Okay we need to talk about when we can meet.” My parents and my husband know me well, and that is the exact way that I would have said it! So we worked it out, and we had the day set for May 21st & 22nd, 2008, as I was going to be home to spend some time with my parents for a vacation.
After almost 35 years, the day finally came that my mom, my dad, my husband and I
After dinner, we went to her house, and I got to see pictures of her when she was younger, and I looked so much like her! It was surreal. Genetics are wild.
The next day was wonderful as well, spending the afternoon with her, touring her home town, looking at more photos. She gave me a picture to keep, as well as a copy of the family lineage, which is so precious to have! I felt so blessed to spend time with her like that. I told her I felt I have met an older sister. My birthmother is someone from whom I can learn, and someone who I call my Special Friend. I couldn’t feel more blessed!
Yes, my biological great aunt wanted me to be aborted, but my birthmother chose life, and I was protected by law from an illegal abortion. God was faithful to my birthmother’s prayer: I was raised in a wonderful Christian home where faith was taught, and it was real.
God has been so very good to
me, and He has blessed me beyond measure with amazing parents, a brother who
also is adopted, a loving husband who I
adore so very much, incredible friends and a tight-knit church family. I was conceived in rape, but I am loved.BIO: Sherry Hensley is pro-life speaker from Maryland – conceived in rape, saved from an illegal abortion, and a blogger for Save The 1. She’s married to a Minister and loves to share her faith and inspire others. Her website is www.thevalueoflife.net
Sunday, May 10, 2015
Thank You Mom For Loving Me, Even Though I Was Conceived Out of Rape by Nick D'Angelo
This Mother's Day, posts everywhere will read about “The best mom ever!” While I wholly support appreciation of parents, I’ve never been able to use such generic, sweeping language because it can feel contrived to me.
I cannot prove my mother is the best by any absolute measure. However, you absolutely can’t measure the love I have for her and the love she has given me. I was conceived when my mother was date-raped, and my understanding of this decision’s weight has steadily grown in the years since she told me.
I simply want to say thank you. Thank you for your courage and strength to carry me, give birth and then raise me at personal inconvenience. Thank you for showing me that the right decision, though not always popular or easy, will always be worthwhile for me and others. Thank you for never tolerating any failure to respect women. Thank you for taking your life’s difficulties and consistently working them for good, without complaining. Thank you for teaching a love of others, not a love of money. Thank you for proving to me that service of others is immensely more valuable than personal gain.
While I fail to uphold all these standards you’ve given me, I thank you for them. Though I may never be good at typical displays of affection, I can assure you of this: I love you mom, and won’t ever stop . . . , after all, you showed me how.
BIO: Nicholas D'Angelo is a Save The 1 blogger and pro-life speaker from upstate NY, and serves on the board of directors of Save the 1. He graduated Summa Cum Laude in May 2013 from the University at Buffalo with a B.S. in Business Administration with a triple concentration in: Supply Chain+Operations, Marketing, and Human Resources.
I cannot prove my mother is the best by any absolute measure. However, you absolutely can’t measure the love I have for her and the love she has given me. I was conceived when my mother was date-raped, and my understanding of this decision’s weight has steadily grown in the years since she told me.
I simply want to say thank you. Thank you for your courage and strength to carry me, give birth and then raise me at personal inconvenience. Thank you for showing me that the right decision, though not always popular or easy, will always be worthwhile for me and others. Thank you for never tolerating any failure to respect women. Thank you for taking your life’s difficulties and consistently working them for good, without complaining. Thank you for teaching a love of others, not a love of money. Thank you for proving to me that service of others is immensely more valuable than personal gain.While I fail to uphold all these standards you’ve given me, I thank you for them. Though I may never be good at typical displays of affection, I can assure you of this: I love you mom, and won’t ever stop . . . , after all, you showed me how.
BIO: Nicholas D'Angelo is a Save The 1 blogger and pro-life speaker from upstate NY, and serves on the board of directors of Save the 1. He graduated Summa Cum Laude in May 2013 from the University at Buffalo with a B.S. in Business Administration with a triple concentration in: Supply Chain+Operations, Marketing, and Human Resources.
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